What Autistic People Want You to Know about Being Autistic

We asked autistics what they would like the world/society to know about autism/being autistic. These were their responses:

“I would like people to know that autism doesn't have a "face", a "profile" or the same characteristics, that's why it's a spectrum. Just because they don't see someone as autistic doesn't mean that they're not, or that they aren't struggling to mask while keeping it together in a chaotic, overstimulating environment.”

 

“I want the world to understand that telling someone "you don't look autistic" isn't a compliment! In fact, this stereotypical viewpoint "autistic people have a certain look" plays a major role in women and people of color getting diagnosed later in life, if ever. It causes us to miss out of years/decades of receiving the support and accommodations we need to thrive in all areas of life. It also leads to mental health concerns like depression, PTSD and anxiety as the result of forced masking, trauma and burnout!”

I'd like the world to know that autism has survived evolution for a reason.  We perceive and process data differently.  We enjoy thinking thoroughly.  We are often trying to find the sequences and algorithms that are the most effective, most efficient and have the least negative impacts to everything and everyone.

“I am only disabled when I must travel a world that refuses to even contemplate change and accept my difference - so for most of my life I hid my differences - with catastrophic consequences for me. Autistic people die on average 16 years earlier than a member of the general population - and we die earlier for all causes of death - functioning in your world kills us. Stop killing us. Embrace difference, embrace change, give us back those 16 years.”

“I really wish people would believe me when I say I like being on my own, I am not unhappy or lonely, and I definitely don't want to be felt sorry for! (And I mean not having many friends/not going out/not seeing anyone except clients and my other half, not being on my own relationship wise). And that I really mean it when I don't want to do anything for my birthday! It doesn't mean come round anyway! Which then I think 'should' also release me from their birthday celebrations/obligations! And, when I'm having a perfectly pleasant WhatsApp chat with someone, that it my idea of socializing, so don't be surprised that I go quiet when they say 'we should meet up for a proper catch up soon' - huh?! That's what I thought we were doing now?!”

 

I wish people would understand that I shouldn't have to make excuses for not socializing to the extent and in the ways that neurotypicals do.

“I love the way my brain works. Certain environments make it harder. I have a big heart and a big brain. Knowing I am autistic is the greatest wellbeing tool. I am deeply comfortable accepting myself. My only wish is that others accepted my difference too.”

“I mean what I say and I say what I mean. I’m not trying to play games. There are no ulterior motives. There is no hidden agenda. I wish people understood that and responded accordingly instead of trying to find ‘hidden meaning’ behind what I have said and complicate things.”

“We didn’t become more autistic while unmasking. We’re letting go of an act we’ve been putting on since we were bullied into it as children.”

“We need more openness and acceptance about diagnosis, unmasking and adapting to life thereon. While most of it will always remain a battle, not belittling anyone who relates to a disorder and not negating and marginalising their suffering is important. We wade through enough waves of self-doubt and imposter syndrome issues without the world adding on to it.”

“I would love for everyone to listen, ask questions, and be open to hearing about our lived experiences that might contradict what the non-autistic world says is the ‘truth’.”

I don't want the world to know anything, I want respect. Knowledge requires people wanting to know, and if they don't want I'm okay, as long as they respect us.